So it's been just over 3 weeks for me on my life change / journey and I've been having some weird thoughts lately.
I've been feeling really positive about my exercise routing. I like the choices I am making and I am finding I want to add a bit more and go every day. I don't want to go crazy because I cannot commit to working out 2-3 hours a day physically and time wise. I do want to do more active things which are a type of exercise than before. The thought that flashed though my mind yesterday was...
"hey you, I know your feeling really good from the kick boxing and walk outside but haven't we been here before? Haven't we committed to exercise and stayed with it for 2 - 3 months only to drop it? Then you go back to being a couch potatoe? What makes this time different?"
I have no idea why but there it was in the my conscious thought.
Also, I was going through the entries in my journal pleased with my progress both with food choices, portions and ratios (ie. fat to carbs, etc). Then a thought popped in my head...
"hey you, I know your feeling really good about the food plan but haven't we been here before? Haven't we committed to the plan and stayed with it for 2 - 3 months only to drop it? Then we gain back all the weight and maybe a little more? What makes this time different?"
I took these thoughts and combined them with my hesitation to share my "change" with my extended family and friends. The only people that know are my son, my sister and circle of bloggers. Why won't I openly disclose what I am doing?
"hey you, you know the answer to this. It's because you've done this so many times in the past and failed. They won't roll their eyes in front of you but they will be thinking... here she goes again, on her dieting and exercise band wagon. I wonder how long it will last this time"
What did I do? I said to myself...
"hey you, stupid. I'm the one in control here so back off. I am the one making the choices and I know in my heart and MIND that this time is different. I'm not going to let you're thoughts have any credibility. I know what's past is past and the future is going to be different. I am the master of my destiny. I will be a changed person by my 52nd birthday, this is not negotiable."
So to add some humour to the cause I've labelled this the angel and devil moment. The devil is the stupid one putting those questionable, defeatist thoughts in my head and the angel is the one in control. I feel really good about this and boy I just love the fact I've found a place to record it and reflect back.
Now my Booya moment (pronounced boooo ya!). I won the biggest loser challenge at the club last week having lost 3.1% of my body weight. I've also maintained my 15 lb loss and still feeling leaner and pumped.
Also it's Blog Hop Wed so join ahead and join in!
Gotta get out for a walk in this glorious weather, ta for now, be happy!
Update: walk was fantastic, 4 miles plus another 1 mile run, booya!