Progress to Ultimate Goal

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Thursday, September 23, 2010

Better late than Never

Well this is a new step for me.  I'm very new to blogging and have only previewed a few but I am a avid amateur writer and have lots of thoughts that I'd like to share (or at least get out there for whomever).  I created this blog under the title of "mind over fatter" since I am, you guessed it, over weight.  Probably obese but I hate that word.  I have struggled with my weight my whole life.  Like many, I have tried many different diets and have ridden the roller coaster of weight loss for the past 35 years (I am 51).  There will be lots of time to look back and reflect, for the moment I want to talk about the here and now.

I am 5.5" and have 81 lbs to lose to get to my goal weight.  I don't look this heavy as per many of my friends but boy do I feel it.  I don't think it's the heaviest I have been but pretty darn close.  As noted above, I am over 50 and I swore I would get my life back together to enjoy this next 10 years but I didn't reach this goal.  I could list the many excuses I tell myself but in actual fact I wasn't ready to lose weight and keep it off.  I did lose 30 lbs late last year but successfully managed to gain it all back plus another 5.  So at the moment I am at the crest of the coaster.

This time though I feel different.  I had a great summer.  Just enough work to keep me busy and bring in the needed finances for the family but lots of play time mixed in.  I took my first two week holiday in over a decade and had a fabulous time at a cottage - eating and drinking to be merry!  I also managed to get some golfing in, landscaping completed, lots of outings with the family and finished a few books.  I am over weight but surprizing not mad at myself.  Normally I would be sitting here in September with lots of regret for the eating and drinking but not this time.  I feel accepting of myself but with that acceptance a different level of determination to change my situation.  I am happy but now know I can be more fulfilled.  I'm thinking about the weight and see it more as a health concern versus the visual beauty I'd like to be.

So this time has to be different.  I can't jump back on the Atkins band wagon, attend Weight Watchers, read another diet book or basically starve myself thinner or should I say healthier.  But I do need support and guidance so I joined a local gym club and a "biggest loser" challenge.  After looking into it I was intrigued and the cost was very reasonable so I joined on Sunday.  So far this week I have done reasonably well.  I ate a few not so healthy things on Tuesday when I was out with the girls but no regrets.  This in itself is a change because in the past I would have either denied myself this simple pleasure or I would indulge and woken the next day with loads of regret and probably slipped back into my old, bad thinking.

This is where "mind over fatter" came from this morning.  I have been doing some research and do believe that weight issues are related to how you think.  I do believe that your mind has a massive impact on whether you are fat or thin; just as it does as to whether you are happy or sad.  Seems simple but for me, I am taking more time to try and dig into my thoughts regarding my weight and why I am where I am at.  I know I will make the commitment to exercise as I have in the past but my normal pattern would be to work out like a fiend, lose weight and shape up, add back the old bad foods and drinks, exercise for a while to keep at the same weight but then, start feeling sluggish and not in the mood to exercise so that tappers off.  Then the weight creeps back on and I watch the lbs and clothes sizes increase...

This blog will be about me - my journey to a happier self.  I want so much more for myself and my life and am excited about getter happier than I am at the present.  The first step will be my "self", mind and body.  I will add photos and be very with my progress.  I'll do some more research on the better blogs I find and use them as examples of what I'd like to add.  That's it for today, be happy!

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